Overcoming Fear … “Oh what the heck, do whatever it takes”
“Oh what the heck, do whatever it takes” “Oh what the heck, do whatever it takes” is the mantra I repeated over and over again in my head the evening of 9/2/2017 as I was ascending to 13,000 feet sitting on the floor of an airplane that had the door OPEN!
Seriously, I was sitting on the floor strapped a bit too intimately to a guy I just met, mere feet from a door that was opened after takeoff to keep us cool.
Not sure this is safe
I was not wearing a seat belt. There were no friendly flight attendants giving me instructions for take off or landing. There was nobody else on the flight as petrified as I was.
Nobody else was overcoming fear, just me.
I was clenching my jaw so hard that I am surprised I didn’t splinter half my teeth. Squeezing my whole body s0 tightly that as I write this, my body is still sore. Shaking and shivering even though it was almost 100 degrees that day.
The door is open to the plane. Yup- The door to the plane is OPEN and we are moving fast and going up.
I can see the ocean, the houses, the land and I am TERRIFIED.
The girl across from me is laughing and giggling and she has no fears in the world.
She ask me if I am cold and I reply “nope- just scared to death.” She grabs my hand (which is shaking and sweating) and we lock eyes and she comforts me. This girl I just met minutes ago.
In a matter of minutes I am going to jump out of a moving plane at 13,000 feet and trust that I will survive it.
It’s time to go, I sit on the edge trembling, sweating, SCARED TO DEATH.
The girl who comforted me hanging off the side encourages me. “Remember to smile while doing this” she says.
The next 45 seconds seemed to last for hours. I tumbled, I turned, I flew and I experienced sensations that I could not have imagined.
There was no “drop” feeling, no “falling” feeling, no feeling what so ever in my stomach.
Just peace. I was FLYING like a bird!
I grabbed that girls hand and then she waved goodbye and like a dream I was waking up from the parachute opened and she became a distance.
I looked down and there I was, so high up above the ground.
I did it.
I gave up control.
I was so scared and vulnerable.
I literally jumped out of a moving airplane at 13,000 feet and I flew.
When you ask people if they would ever “jump out of an airplane” you seem to get two extreme reactions.
Either, YES! I have done it 50 times! Or “HELL NO! I have no interest!”
That second reaction was always my reaction until it wasn’t. Until I found myself 13,000 above ground looking fear in the eye.
Stepping out of comfort zones, trusting and transforming
I believe in transformation – heck I have helped hundreds of thousands change their bodies and ultimately their lives, and I speak a lot about the power of mindset and stepping out of comfort zones to do so.
However, there was something missing- I had spoken about mindset and had applied it to my body but I wasn’t applying it to my own fears and challenges.
After doing a LOT of personal development work I was able to dive deep into what was holding me back from helping more people and truly living a purpose I could be proud of.
I learned that things that had served me to some level, were holding me back from bigger things. I had heard (but now I KNOW) that what gets us to where we are, will NOT get us to where we need to go.
Some of my old ways of being that I was ready to let go of:
- I was a control freak
- I was not trusting
- I was stuck in my own limiting beliefs
- I had shut off my “feelings”
So it was incredible that after finishing a recent transformational workshop, I had the thought that so many never dare to think. I thought “I want to jump out of an airplane.” Not sure where that thought came from, but it came 🙂
So, on my 46th birthday, in a post I made HERE I declared that I would do it.
I looked at my husband after I shared the post and he said “how about today?”
Even though it has been years, my husband has over 150 skydives, so he was no stranger to skydiving or what I was going to experience. Within 20 minutes he came back in the room and told me “Happy Birthday…you are booked and 100% jumping today!”
Well, at sunset that day, there I was 🙂
How do I feel now that I DID IT!?
I am still slightly traumatized lol (would be lying to say I was not!)
But over all I feel INVIGORATED, accomplished, and like I can do anything now.
My ego was checked, I trusted, I gave up control and I felt grateful, humbled and like I am ready to take on the world.
Massive positive breakthroughs, enlightenment, and transformation ALWAYS follows when we face our fears, get fully present in the moment AND leave our comfort zones. This I know for sure.
From now on, I will always push myself to do the things that scare me. I will fully EMBRACE my feelings. I will accept the risk, look my fears in the eye, and literally JUMP…
I hope one day you will fly too…